Definition:Tight wad

So I’m in Starbucks waiting in line to get my cup of Joe. I look down and see a $20 sitting on the ground a few people in front of me. I, being the nice person that I am, tap the lady on the shoulder nearest to the $20 thinking it was hers. She says "thanks" and picks it up and puts it in her coat pocket.
Meanwhile, the guy ahead of this lady watches this all go down and realizes it’s his $20. The guy in looks in his now empty hand and says: "Oh, that was mine, I dropped it."
She reached into her pocket and gave it back to the guy...

It wasn't even hers to begin with!!!

Can you the balls of that lady?
I saw it, the lady picked it up and put it in her pocket and it wasn't even hers?!?!

If anyone should have gotten it, it was me!!!

I know times are tough people, but if you're buying coffee at Starbucks, then you don't need an extra $20....

Really?

I went and got my coffee at Starbucks today and low and behold they are using their holiday cups already. Really? Its the first week of november and the high for today is supposed to be in the 70's. I thought it was bad to see Christmas stuff in Target the other day, but this is going TOO far...

White Cheddar Cheez-its

Are the devil....

Milk in a Bag

Why do baggers at grocery stores ask if you want your milk in a bag?

Does anyone not get their milk in a bag? 

Do people really enjoy carrying the milk by the cold wet handle? 

Among other things, carrying milk in a bag allows a person to carry so much more at once. I can't think of a single benefit of not putting your milk in a bag. 

Anyone care to enlighten me?

Fall Rocks

Today is a beautiful day here in Chicago. 

It was a crisp 45 this morning when I got up. 

Today's High: 57

Time to get out the fall clothing!

Kindest Regards....

My Friend Adam posted some things about email signatures a while ago so I thought I'd weigh in on this highly debated topic.

Why do people put closings to emails in their signatures? I think its lazy and a bad practice. Is it really hard to type "Thanks, " at the end of each email? Here are a few instances where this strategy fails:

1. You are emailing someone trying to be forceful. 

Example:

John, 

Due to your incompetence, I've had to work all weekend to get the system backup. If you ever do this again, you'll be cleaning the gum off the sidewalk out front!

Kindest Regards,

Nick

Are you really getting your point across when you do this??

2. You are replying to an email and your email program marks your text in a different font than your signature. 

Example:

"I concur

Thanks, Nick"

That looks ridiculous.

3. You are sending a response to a co-worker were a closing makes no sense. 

Example: 

7

Regards, Nick

Does 7 really need a "Regards"? I think not.

Come on people. Lets stop being lazy!

Cubs Clinch!

From Cubs Clinch!

I know its been almost a week since they clinched, but I didn't have a chance to post my pics from the game. So without further ado...

http://picasaweb.google.com/nick.althoff/CubsClinch#

The video is of the last pitch of the game.

Enjoy!

Coffee Maker

Why is it that when I'm at work and I go and get some coffee and the coffee pot has about 1/2 of an ounce in it?? I understand that if you are the person that takes the last of the coffee, that you are supposed to make a new pot. Lets be honest, leaving anything less than half a cup left constitutes taking "the last". 

Making coffee is not that difficult people!

Steps:

1. Locate Filter basket and remove from coffee maker.
2. Throw away filter/grounds
   
3. Put in new filter and fill with Coffee grounds
   
4. Place filter basket in Coffee maker
   
5. Push BREW button.
   

Wow. Wasn't that easy?

I propose a new rule: If anyone leaves less than 1/2 a cup of coffee in the bottom of the pot and doesn't make a new pot, the remainder of the pot is poured directly on their lap, preferably steaming hot.

Who is with me??

Definition of Ironic

Watching "Biggest loser" while chowing down on a bowl of 3 scoops of Chocolate fudge ice cream with a cookie on top...

Andrea Kramer Drinking Game

I hate Andrea Kramer. She's got the intelligence of my dog's back left leg. In honor of such an intelligent lady, I have come up with a new drinking game to try when you are trying to watch Sunday night football.

Stares blankly at the camera - 1 drink

Mis-pronounces a name - 2 drinks

Looks at her notes - 2 drinks

Looks at her notes more than once - 4 drinks

Mentions Tom Brady - 5 drinks

She gives a report but is not shown on TV - 0 drinks, Consider yourself lucky!

She starts looking even remotely good looking - Chug until you can't see.

	# of drinks
Stutters	1
stares blankly at the screen	1
mis-pronounces a name	2
Looks at her notes	3

Also-Ran

I hate this term. I think it should be banned. Its supposed to be a slap in the face of the person they are talking about, but in my opinion, it makes the user look like an uncreative idiot.

While I'm at it, I also hate "stay-cation". If your going to just sit at home and eat Cheetos just say that. No need to call it anything fancy!

Technology Rocks!

Why does technology Rock?
Today I was on the El heading to work. I always read the newspaper on the way to work and like everyone who reads the paper, I end up with ink on my finger tips. On my way down I wiped my face with my hand and immediately wondered if I had any ink smudge on my face. How to remedy the situation? TECHNOLOGY!
I wiped out my Motorola Q and took a picture of my face. After admiring my face for a while i checked and there was no smudge.
Good thing there wasn't any because I didn't pay the extra to get the wet wipes attachment for my phone.
Technology Rocks!

McDonalds

So Every time i eat at McDonalds, i swear it will be the last time. However, every time I feel hung over or just not right, i eat there and I start feeling better. Then I start thinking about what I just ate and my stomach starts getting a little upset again. I'm not sure what McD's puts in their grease, but my stomach seems to like it, and then hate it.
So I went to the McD's website today to hav a look at the "nutritional" facts. I was astounded. I knew stuff wasn't very good for you, but it was worse than I thought!

Here is the break down:

Its good to know that I got 137% of my cholesterol and 75% of my Saturated fat intake for the day. Those two are the hardest to obtain!

WOW!

Why I'm a nerd

I'm working from home today and I'm working on my work laptop while I play music from my home computer. Instead of having to get up and walk 10 feet to skip songs I don't like, I just remoted into my home computer and I'm changing songs from the comfort of my work laptop.
Why walk when you can sit? :)

I hate heat

Ug. The weather here has turned from spring to summer in a hurry and I don't like it one bit. As I've always said "You can always put more clothes on, but you can only take off so much before you get arrested!"

Does this make any sense?

So I'm watching a show on the Travel Channel about hambugers and the owner says this: "When a customer walks in the door, we always say hello to them so that they know that they aren't like everyone else."
While I understand what the true meaning was, what was actually said makes no sense. If you do in fact say 'Hello' to everyone that comes in, then you ARE treating each and every customer like each and every other customer. Therefore, you ARE like everyone else.
Its a bit like the transitive property.

Songs I'm listening to

I finally fired up itunes today. Its been a while since I've listened to music at work. Not exactly sure why. Here is a list of songs I've listened to that I hadn't heard in a long time
1. Fade to Black - Metallica
2. Hook - Blues Traveler
3. Comedown - Bush
4. The Distance - Cake
5. Fourty-Six & 2 - Tool

Good stuff....

Random Thought

Why do dogs eat their own puke? I mean, there is a reason you puked it up in the first place!

Doggie Puke

Last night our dog Jake decided to spice up the lives of my wife and I. He sneaked into the bathroom and stole an "undergarment" and was running around with it. I have to admit that it was pretty funny until he decided that he was a big hungry and swallowed it whole. Seriously, it took about 2 seconds and it disappeared.
Initially I wasn't sure if i should laugh at him swallowing underwear or be worried about the repercussions in the digestive track. We did some quick research and found out that inducing vomiting in dogs is relatively easy.
Step 1: Fill squirt bottle w/ 1/4 cup of peroxide
Step 2: Bring dog into bathroom and pick up any items on the floor you don't want doggie puke on
Step 3: Hold up your dog's mouth and squirt the peroxide into his mouth so he swallows it
Step 4: Wait about 3 minutes
Step 5: Dog pukes
Step 6: Grab the swallowed object off of the floor as soon as you see it so your dog doesn't try to eat it again.

It most definitely seemed mean to induce vomiting in our dog, but the alternative of having to possibly take him to the vet for an operation for bowel obstruction seemed much worse. And Jake is no worse for the wear the next morning.
Needless to say, Jake will not be allowed to run around with a piece of clothing any smaller than a pair of coveralls. :)

Saving the environment, One cup of coffee at a time...

Yesterday was Earth day. At the client I'm currently at, they gave out really nice metal/plastic cups for coffee. The idea is that you should the new coffee cup instead of getting a new paper cup every time.
This morning was the first time I got to try out my new cup. My client has one of those "flavia" single serving coffee machines. Being very much excited, I chose my favorite blend (Italian) put it in the machine. I could almost taste the coffee already...
*Clank*
That's the noise the cup made as I tried to jam it into the hole at the bottm of the machine where the cup goes.
*Clank* *Clank*
Huh, would you look at that, the new coffee cup doesn't fit! So what is a person to do?
I've got it! I'll just use a paper cup and when the coffee finishes, i'll pour it into my new environment saving metal cup.
Wow.
I LOVE saving the environment!

Pet Peeve

Why is it that when I open a yogurt, I always get squirted, but when i take the time to put my hand up to block the squirting, it NEVER squirts?!?!

Dog Obedience

So we have an almost 1.5 year old Yellow lab named Jake. He's a fantastically great dog, but like all dogs has a few things that we'd like to break him of or teach him.
A couple months ago we enrolled him in a dog obedience class and I love it. Teaching dogs to do things is an exercise in both patience and psychology. Dogs really are intelligent animals, but you have to know how to explain things to them.
We are using clicker training to teach him things and this little thing is an amazing tool. Instead of trying to teach an entire "trick" at once, you work on shaping the behavior you want. If you want your dog to always go lay down on a rug when you say "bed" you need to reward your dog every time he gets closer and closer to the rug. Once he is going to the bed constantly, then you add your command. The limits of this training are only bound by your imagination and patience. Its incredibly rewarding to succeed in teaching your dog a "trick".

Next up for Jake... Agility training!

I'm Certified!

I took the Microsoft 70-630 certification and I passed with Flying colors. I'm now a Microsoft Certified Technology specialist in configuring SharePoint 2007. Yay me! :)

Restaurant Review: Que Rico

Que Rico
http://chicago.metromix.com/restaurants/mexican/que-rico-lincoln-park/134792/content

Amy and I tried this place on Saturday night and we liked it. We had reservations and we were glad we did as the place filled up soon after we got there.
The atmosphere is a low-light romantic type place. We were seated in one of the worst tables in the place, but even that wasn't that bad.
The service was fairly good and only a bit slow a few times. We both had margaritas (I had 2) and we liked them.
The food was very good. I love mexican food so I loved it, but Amy's not always a fan of it and she enjoyed what she got.
Overall we really liked it and we'll be back again when we're in the mood for mexican.